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Funny Quotes, Funny Picture Quotes & Quotations: 2

Funny Quotes Pictures

When I was a young girl my late Uncle Henry Lee, used to say you don't believe fat meat is greasy do you? and I answered no, because my young ears..
-Loven Carter

Life

When I was a young girl my late Uncle Henry Lee, used to say you don't believe fat meat is greasy do you? and I answered no, because my young ears..
-Loven Carter

Life

Each of us possesses an inner spiritual compass. But not everyone’s needle is magnetized. Each of us possesses an inner spiritual compass. But not everyone’s needle is magnetized...

Philosophy Wisdom

we got to create meanings about everything we do.....for them to count....!!! We got to create meanings about everything we do.....for them to count....!!!..

Love Relationship Short Truth heart break

Once we master our purpose....,many roads become clear...!! Once we master our purpose....,many roads become clear...!!..

Inspirational Love Relationship Short Success

living is a strategy....i would feel scared for someone to tell me good life is in being soft for Living is a strategy....i would feel scared for someone to tell me good life is in being soft for..

Inspirational Life Love Relationship Success

The flexibility of our minds...., is the life we live and the careers we pursue...!! The flexibility of our minds...., is the life we live and the careers we pursue...!!..

Inspirational Life Philosophy Short Success

We shall not keep looking classy...when all our aims are on chasing the opposite ...!! We shall not keep looking classy...when all our aims are on chasing the opposite ...!!..

Life Love Philosophy Relationship Success

Your own rules of time.....is the reasoning you have now...!! Your own rules of time.....is the reasoning you have now...!!..

Inspirational Life Love Philosophy Short

Talk to them is thats all you can do so well....!! Talk to them is thats all you can do so well....!!..

Life Relationship Short Truth Wisdom

Wrong imaginations can never replace a simple good thought and that simple plan...!! Wrong imaginations can never replace a simple good thought and that simple plan...!!..

Inspirational Love Relationship Truth Wisdom

Not all waves are bad waves...., some brings fish clover to the sores of the lake...!! Not all waves are bad waves...., some brings fish clover to the sores of the lake...!!..

Inspirational Philosophy Relationship Short Success

The thoughts of time...should be good to improve us in that time...!! The thoughts of time...should be good to improve us in that time...!!..

Inspirational Philosophy Relationship Success Truth

When  the mind is at holiday....., let it enjoy the holiday...!! When the mind is at holiday....., let it enjoy the holiday...!!..

Love Philosophy Relationship Success heart break

Lets lift up the Shortest Persons, the Tallest Ones are closer to Heaven. Lets lift up the Shortest Persons, the Tallest Ones are closer to Heaven...

Love Philosophy Relationship Success heart break

If you cant read/ pronounce it, spell it. If you cant read/ pronounce it, spell it...

Truth

The genuine love i have not  not seen.. and i have not felt ..is the kind of love i shall not The genuine love i have not not seen.. and i have not felt ..is the kind of love i shall not..

Inspirational Life Love Philosophy Relationship

The genuine love i have not for not seen.., i have not felt ..is the kind of love i shall not The genuine love i have not for not seen.., i have not felt ..is the kind of love i shall not..

Inspirational Life Love Philosophy Relationship

You must learn to tame even when there is no one who can tame you...!! You must learn to tame even when there is no one who can tame you...!!..

Inspirational Life Love Relationship Short

Where all the big wallets are only at war....it becomes everyone Where all the big wallets are only at war....it becomes everyone's duty to engage in some sort of a..

Inspirational Love Philosophy Relationship Success

Prayer was not invented by fools......, ignore it at your own risk..!! Prayer was not invented by fools......, ignore it at your own risk..!!..

Inspirational Life Love Philosophy Relationship

We We're sometimes determined to introduce them to our emotions...., yet all they need is our..

Inspirational Life Love Relationship Success

a Little praise of the lord and Little sharing can earn someone a blessing...!! A Little praise of the lord and Little sharing can earn someone a blessing...!!..

Inspirational Life Love Relationship Success

I got up to try out my talents....and i saw the will of God around me....!! I got up to try out my talents....and i saw the will of God around me....!!..

God Inspirational Life Love Philosophy


Top 10 Funny Quotes

The rhythms we listen too end up becoming a life style we live...!! Some are rhythms of love, of reason, of decisions, of courage and some are rhythms of hope...!!- William SebunjeThe rhythms we listen too end up becoming a life style we live...!! Some are rythmms of love, of reason, of decisions, of courage and some are rhythms of hope...!!- William SebunjeWhen things are to work....it rains only after our arrival.....!!- William SebunjeThe one who brought us headsets did something good......, You can be there listening to your nice things....sited next to someone thinking badly whole day....!!- William SebunjeWe may not be sooo loving....., but as long as we remain the source of solutions.....!!- William SebunjeI find pride in being the solution and sources of resolutions others have around..!!- William Sebunje“I’m not a robot” I click robotically.- John Alejandro KingDo not wear your nice ties at the dancing square ……, drunkards will pull you to dance like a goat late in the evenings …!!- William SebunjeI met people who decide and never mean what they decide......., They blamed me for implementing all the decisions...., one said take things easy..., I left ...then they complained as to why i left them to stagnate...!!!!- William SebunjeI met people who decide and never mean what they decide......., They blamed me for implementing all the decisions...., one said take things easy..., I left ...then they complained as to why i left them to stagnate...!!!!- William Sebunje

Inspirational + Funny Quotes


Inspirational Quotes Life is a joke, laugh it up - David Lee ShepherdLife's a joke, laugh it up - David Lee ShepherdTo chill is to kill your everyday work drill. - shiza shahidI run to jog my memory - Beverley AzevedoArt is rich, but artists are poor! - Halil XhafaThose who are not lions must accept having the little remainder. - mohdmustafa99Let's enjoy the life we're creating for ourselves. That's the only thing I'm in control of. What I do is my business. What you and someone else do is your business. Let's learn to live with our mistakes. - Marie Yolande PierreDevelop positive from negative and prove yourself - swati somalMy legal practices seem be updated , and my charisma is being updated.....i have reached room of no acceptance to any mishandling...!! - William SebunjeWhere i'm forced to stop traversing where i must traverse ......is not a place for me to live in for best of ideologies....!! - William SebunjeOnce the value of time has come for man to relocate mind.....it will flood both in his mind, in his house, at the gate, and on the way....!! The sign when the true of signs of change has life, even true friends become enemies for man to quit without return....!! - William SebunjeOnce the value of time is into relocating minds....., friends become enemies, the helped starts to feel he's the helper.....It rains everywhere including in the mans mind.., bedrooms .., gates become hard to enter and to get out ..!!! We're to read signs of time and its changes..!! - William SebunjeOnce the value of time is into relocating minds....., friends become enemies, the helped starts to feel he's the helper.....It rains everywhere including in the mans mind.., bedrooms .., gates become hard to enter and to get out ..!!! We're required to read signs of time and its meanings..!! - William SebunjeEven when school was a tough place ...It taught me that everything is all about achieving a pass-mark ...!! Exams can Smash the most loved and blessed those most hated and never in love....!! - William SebunjeEven when school was a tough place ...It taught me that everything is all about achieving a pass-mark ...!! Exams can Smash the most loved and bless the most hated and the never in love....!! - William SebunjeWhen enemies become many and scarcity of items become the leading life style.....Vacancy become what we should create for someone else....! - William SebunjeOnce we fail to recognize the fact that we're extroverted thinkers....., we fail to safe guards our minds from negative thoughts ...!! Than end up affecting us...!! - William SebunjeOnce my thoughts start to become negative.....my counselor advised i should plan to quit immediately...or else i can author what can destroy humanity....!! - William SebunjeOnce the subject matter has become negative ...., we're required to sort it there and then or else resolve and relocated...!!! Good brains should should be helped to keep splashing that true life of goodness....!! - William SebunjeAs thinkers ..Once the subject matter has become negative ...., we're required to sort it out there and then or else resolve and relocated immediately ..!!! Good brains should should be helped to keep splashing that true life of goodness or else hurt everyone around....!! - William SebunjeThe men who were seen cleaning the river.....They poisoned water because they their cows to drink clean free from insects and in the end all the cows, fish, frogs, animals, humans that drunk the water died....!!" some times nature is has it better why it makes it be that way...!" - William SebunjeThe men who were seen cleaning the river.....They poisoned water because they their cows to drink clean free from insects and in the end all the cows, fish, frogs, animals, humans that drunk the water died....!!" some times nature has it better as to why it prepares it that way...!" - William SebunjeI got to promise myself someday to ignore any situations that would lead me into negative battles ,..!! I can re-buy the bursens and plates , but i have no where to purchase my peace again once lost....!! - William SebunjeI got to promise myself someday to ignore any situations that would lead me into negative battles ,..!! I can re-buy the bursens and plates , but i have no where to purchase my peace of mind once lost....!! - William SebunjeThe changes of time and changes of reasons for be so and so.....starts by changing the class of issues around us....!! Some are our own coolness we lose , but all because change has come for us to respond to it...!! - William SebunjeNot all lakes house fish.......are some are lakes for crocodiles.....!! Not all days should be for us to expect the best...some days for mere planning our best ahead...!! - William SebunjeNot all lakes house fish.......some are lakes for crocodiles....and some for hypoos .!! Not all days should be for us to expect the best...some days for mere planning our best ahead...!! - William SebunjeSome are real direction of solutions that Lord is showing us to take ....it is why things become complicated elsewhere...!! - William SebunjeSome are real direction of solutions the Lord is showing us to take ....it is why things become complicated elsewhere...!! - William SebunjeWrong place doesn't attract anything good ....we even form enemies with those meant to be on our side...!! We have a duty to read signs always...!! - William SebunjeWrong place doesn't attract anything good ....we even form enemies with those meant to be on our side...!! We have a duty to read signs always and interpret with resolutions ...!! - William SebunjeIn any situation train yourself never to be terminated by anyone......That will be the greatest negative impact of life you will create..!!! Learn to quit early and quit gently and you will live happy even in scarcity...!! - William SebunjeThe stress and effect are less on why we just left........, than the why we were chased away and terminated....!!! Gentle departure is always Godly and more peace rewarding...!! I once again say, Learn to quit on your own than to wait till being chased away ...!! - William SebunjeOthers doesn't know......for me i have been and i shall keep to be a hunter of peace =....!! Where peace can not prevail even life become miserly...!! - William SebunjeThere is a time when we must be good at measuring our natural weakness and how shall we get out strong of that confusing situation anyone else would harass on...!! - William SebunjeThere is a time when we must be good at measuring our natural weakness and how shall we get out strong of that confusing situation anyone else would harass on...!! Sometimes all we need is for our crops to flower sooooooo well to count it a blessing coming upon us....!! - William SebunjeEvery stage of life with its own tricks of by passing issues....., because every stage with its own challenges.....!! Ababy can find lots of what to eat in the mother when the mother is into thinking of what to eat today.....!! tricks tricks is all we have to be good at than to worry...!! - William SebunjeEvery stage of life with its own tricks of by passing issues....., because every stage with its own challenges.....!! A baby can find lots of what to eat in the mother's breast when the mother is into thinking of her own issues.....!! tricks tricks is all we have to be good at everyday ...!! - William SebunjeWhen being tricky is all we can be good at....we have to ensure we're the best tricky/...!! - William SebunjeLife rotates around the things we do with ease......., The things we do with ease are things others pay for lovely and quickly...!! - William SebunjeOnce a government sponsored student failed to understand that ins private sponsorship everything is all about tick the most essential as you ignore the exciting...!! - William SebunjeOnce a government sponsored student failed to understand that in private sponsorship everything is all about tick the most essential as you ignore the exciting...!! - William SebunjeOnce a former employee failed to understand that the life of an entrepreneurs is on think and act mode.....and yet in employments everything is think and suggest to seniors....!! - William SebunjeWhy invest our money and time and yet we're ashamed to be seen doing it...!!!? We shall not cross the river if we can not push our vehicle ...!! - William SebunjeIf it is collective effort please never step out to spend money alone....put it in that pool of basket....!! Don't come to tell us how you bought 1000 candles......when the plan is to hire a generator to cater for both music and light....!!! - William SebunjeIf it is collective effort please never step out to spend money alone....put it in that pool of a basket....!! Please...Don't come to tell us how you bought 1000 candles......when the plan is to hire a generator to cater for both music and light....!!! - William SebunjeIf it is collective effort please never step out to spend money alone....put it in that pool of a basket..!! Please...Don't come to tell us how you bought 1000 candles....when the plan is to hire a generator to cater for both music and light....!!! - William SebunjeOnce a Carpenter realizes that he could be born to produce 10000 chairs....., it becomes easy to keep innovating no matter how hard it becomes .....This is how we should keep motivated...!! - William SebunjeTry to imagine when you're born to create 100000 Chairs as Carpenter for the world.....and yet you have just made 200, but complaining how hard things are .....!!! What would happen ?? - William SebunjeTry to imagine you're born to create 100000 Chairs as a Carpenter for the world.....,and you have just made 200... would God make you feel at home when he needs you to work...!!? I think some are forces of nature pushing us to work more than we can see everything as hard...!! - William SebunjeThe base is always wider.....there is a stage we shall chase many subjects, many goals , many languages, many interests, many careers titles and a stage to stick to the only Ideal.....!!! Which stage are you....!! - William SebunjeSometimes we have to learn to keep pour tough minds somewhere......, Because you carry tough minds...we get to realise everything is just basic....this alone can become an issue to add in...!! - William SebunjeSometimes we have to learn to keep our tough minds somewhere......, as we carry tough minds there ...,we get to realize everything is just basic....this alone can become an issue to add in...!! Give the grader tough road works dear...!! - William SebunjeDo not fail to be creative... , when situations are calling for maximum creativity...!! - William SebunjeOne should find a stage when he would rather show up late....., than stupid....!! - William SebunjeThose who understands our resilience, our creativity, our determinations, our intellect, our aim.....shall never doubt our friendship even in times of total disappearance ...!! - William SebunjeWhere hope is shattered ..., charisma become a nightmare...!! - William SebunjeDon't be lured by the excitements of friends to attach a wrong enemy......, the impact is yours to register..!! - William SebunjeWhere possible stay creative, stay thoughtful, stay courageous , find some aims and stick to them, stay reasonable, surrender where you should to keep the road open , and ensure to invest in your imaginary of good things...!! - William SebunjeDo not be lured by friends to attack a wrong enemy.....Do not and do not ....!! - William SebunjeIf all kingdoms must be united to be rules by one......, there shall be too much noise...., divide teams by their function.. !! - William SebunjeThere are those the day you resolve to promote them....you we develop issues and become enemies there and then......!!! This is how things happen in the law of optimum rewards..!!! - William SebunjeThere are those the day we resolve to promote them.... we develop issues and become enemies there and then......!!! This is how things happen with the law of optimum allocations..!!! - William SebunjeDO not be lured by friends to attack a wrong enemy Dear.....!!! - William SebunjeDo not be lured by friends to attack a wrong enemy Dear.....!!! - William SebunjeDo not be lured by friends to attack a wrong enemy Dear! - William SebunjeDo not be lured by friends to deny your only desired love a chance....!! - William SebunjeScarcity of Rain, Scarcity of sun shine, Scarcity of Plants, Scarcity of wind, Scarcity of profitable days and nights ....Have nothing to do with A mans integrity...!!! - William SebunjeScarcity of Rain, Scarcity of sun shine, Scarcity of Plants, Scarcity of wind, Scarcity of profitable days and nights ....Have nothing to do with a man's integrity...!!! - William SebunjeScarcity of Rain, Scarcity of sun shine, Scarcity of Plants, Scarcity of wind, Scarcity of profitable days and nights ....Have nothing to do with a man's integrity...!!! - William SebunjeWe all have to define the key to our greatness...to some it is good school grades, maximum creativity, excessive energy , outstanding beauty and attraction , command of language ......,quick mind and to some everything is about our background to be born connected....!! - William SebunjeWe all have to define the key to our greatness...to some it is good school grades, maximum creativity, excessive energy , outstanding beauty and attraction , command of language ...,quick mind and to some everything is about our background to be born connected..!! We can tap it the same...!!! - William SebunjeThe logic is simple...... run around and then settle...... but do not settle and then run around.....!! - William SebunjeBefore we settle for the most upright we have to try out this and that, we have to do this and that ....as kids we even have to try eating everything including caterpillars...!! There is no harm in lose ...as long as we aim to locate the best of our being...!! - William SebunjeBefore we settle for the most upright we have to try out this and that, we have to do this and that ....as kids we even have to try eating everything including caterpillars..,it is why we must uproot some teeth.! truly There is no harm in lose ...as long as we aim to locate the best of us..!! - William SebunjeBefore we settle for the most upright we have to try out this and that, we have to do this and that ...as kids we even have to try eating everything including caterpillars..,it is why we must uproot some teeth..! truly there is no harm in lose ...as long as we aim to locate the best of us..!! - William SebunjeBefore we settle for the most upright we have to try out this and that, we have to do this and that ...as kids we even have to try eating everything including caterpillars..,it is why we must uproot some teeth..! truly there is no harm in lose ...as long as we aim to locate the best..!! - William SebunjeBefore we settle for the most upright we have to try out this and that, we have to do this and that ...as kids we even have to try eating everything including caterpillars..,it is why we must uproot some teeth..! truly there is no harm in lose ...as long as we aim to locate the best..!! - William SebunjeWhen get to know we're in wrong battles we shall never end....once we staring turn our brothers and sisters into typical enemies...!! It means issues have a reached our bedroom..!! - William SebunjeOpening battles with relatives....it mean opening battles we shall never end..., we shall never negotiate, and the most bloody battles as everything is about bloodline...!!"avoid those battles always...!! - William SebunjeWe either have to get out of our beds to catch up with our negatives or our positive thinking about everything...!!"Choice of thoughts is the issue.."! - William SebunjeNegative interpretations of others can never leave us progressive...!!Some Are wrong complaints and some are wrong assumptions about everything..!! - William SebunjeOnce we get to understand the magic in which rain is formed .....we get to learn about the magic of opportunities...!! - William SebunjeThere is no value is waking up to catch up with our all negatives.....!! - William SebunjeThere is no value is waking up to catch up with all all negatives thoughts .....!! Change the style you walk, you eat, you sleep, you dress and you will realize change in thoughts ...!! - William SebunjeThe greatness of our thoughts are the plans we lay and aim at....!! - William SebunjeSeparation isn't a bad idea as long as we separate for the better of ourselves ......Sometimes it is the will of God at play...!! - William SebunjeSeparation isn't a bad idea as long as we separate for the better of ourselves ......Sometimes it is the will of God at play...!! - William SebunjeNature shall force us shift or stagnate where it needs us....., Sometimes everything have to be that so as we become ourtrue selves...!! - William SebunjeWrong thoughts can never give us better plans, and wrong plans have no value to even the owner...!! - William SebunjeSometimes the magic of love i all about having shared vision, share solutions , shared life ambitions...... Everything wont work out of mere magic...!! - William SebunjeI once saw some fight to take up my jobs.....I left him take... What he didn't know was that it needed philosophy and excessive motivation....he entered with socialism , which failed to work....!!! Should we forgive them......!?? - William SebunjeNot all levels of goodness is defined by the village...., some are goodness of our own imaginations....!!!Do not fail to imagine right ...!! - William SebunjeWhere we can not love ourselves....we can not aim.....!! - William SebunjePretty shall not only be of other.....some are are our days to be pretty loving ......!! - William SebunjePretty shall not only be of other.....some are are our days to be pretty loving ......!! - William SebunjeWhen radicalism has become a brother to rationality ...., plenty of good decisions become our library...!! - William SebunjeWhen radicalism has become a brother to rationality ...., plenty decisions is all we make everyday...!! - William SebunjeThere are those who have only tasted our Radicalism....., all they don't know is We're plenty and plenty Loving ...!!! - William SebunjeThe good will around my name...has always inspired me to keep willing and to live a willing life...!! - William SebunjeA day come when all we have to deal with is to outsmart our own ignorance.....!! It either leaves us ...or we carry it everywhere...!! - William SebunjeA day arrives when all we have to deal with is to outsmart our own ignorance.....!! It either leaves us ...or we carry it everywhere...!! - William SebunjeWhen we keep close to our own minds....everything keep interesting.....!!! - William SebunjeWhen we keep close to our own minds....everything keep interesting.....!!! - William SebunjeWhen we keep close to our own minds....everything keep interesting.....!!! - William SebunjeHow do you wake up to tell us it isn't God will.....,When everything has been because of God's will ..!!! - William SebunjeHow do you wake up to tell us it isn't God's will.....,When everything has been because of God's will ..!!!? - William SebunjeEvery Man is supreme by nature....., supremacy is destroyed by the allusion of his wrong commitments...!! - William SebunjeEvery Man is supreme by nature.... , as long as there no illusion of wrong commitments ...!! - William SebunjeIf we can all learn the art of resolving our own conflicts ......, it means the whole world can be conflict free...!!! - William SebunjeIf we can all learn the art of resolving our own conflicts ......, it means the whole world shall be conflict free...!!! - William SebunjeIf we can all learn the art of resolving our own conflicts.., it means the whole world shall be conflict free...!!! - William SebunjeAn idle mind is the most busy mind by the direction of its wrong thoughts ....!! - William SebunjeI met people who decide and never mean what they decide......., The blamed me for implementing all the decisions...., one said take things easy..., I left the they complained as to why i left them to stagnate...!!!! - William SebunjeI met people who decide and never mean what they decide......., They blamed me for implementing all the decisions...., one said take things easy..., I left ...then they complained as to why i left them to stagnate...!!!! - William SebunjeI met people who decide and never mean what they decide......., They blamed me for implementing all the decisions...., one said take things easy..., I left ...then they complained as to why i left them to stagnate...!!!! - William SebunjeDo not wear your nice ties at the dancing square ……, drunkards will pull you to dance like a goat late in the evenings …!! - William SebunjeI find pride in being the solution and sources of resolutions others have around..!! - William SebunjeWe may not be sooo loving....., but as long as we remain the source of solutions.....!! - William SebunjeThe one who brought us headsets did something good......, You can be there listening to your nice things....sited next to someone thinking badly whole day....!! - William SebunjeWhen things are to work....it rains only after our arrival.....!! - William SebunjeThe rhythms we listen too end up becoming a life style we live...!! Some are rythmms of love, of reason, of decisions, of courage and some are rhythms of hope...!! - William SebunjeThe rhythms we listen too end up becoming a life style we live...!! Some are rhythms of love, of reason, of decisions, of courage and some are rhythms of hope...!! - William SebunjeA Little praise of the lord and Little sharing can earn someone a blessing...!! - William SebunjeWe're sometimes determined to introduce them to our emotions...., yet all they need is our vision...!! - William SebunjePrayer was not invented by fools......, ignore it at your own risk..!! - William SebunjeWhere all the big wallets are only at war....it becomes everyone's duty to engage in some sort of a prayer for gates not to be blocked ...., You think those guys care....!!! - William SebunjeYou must learn to tame even when there is no one who can tame you...!! - William SebunjeThe genuine love i have not for not seen.., i have not felt ..is the kind of love i shall not merely fake....!! - William SebunjeThe genuine love i have not not seen.. and i have not felt ..is the kind of love i shall not merely fake to house....!! - William SebunjeThe thoughts of time...should be good to improve us in that time...!! - William SebunjeNot all waves are bad waves...., some brings fish clover to the sores of the lake...!! - William SebunjeWrong imaginations can never replace a simple good thought and that simple plan...!! - William SebunjeYour own rules of time.....is the reasoning you have now...!! - William SebunjeThe flexibility of our minds...., is the life we live and the careers we pursue...!! - William SebunjeLiving is a strategy....i would feel scared for someone to tell me good life is in being soft for everything....!! Good life is in the ability to maneuver....!!! - William SebunjeOnce we master our purpose....,many roads become clear...!! - William Sebunje

Short + Funny Quotes


Short Quotes I'm glad I have done good number of bad things. - Lokesh giriWhen genius leaves the brain foolishness fills the void. - Lokesh giriIf most of us are abnormal, being abnormal becomes normal - Lokesh giriMy dad is a millionaire, he has millions in debt. - Lokesh giriIf you stare at some one long enough they blink. - Jack BrownWe are afraid that things that on an average could never happen to us might happen to us. - william anneLiving in saudi without a car is like living in england without a girlfriend - diya ahmed azzonyIt is better to have skeletons in your closet than a dead hooker in your trunk. - Christoper DeBonisWake-up Alarms are probably one of the most inhuman, merciless and cruelest inventions of man.. - saikiranQ: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Why not? - Gregorio SantosAmong fools I'm canis majoris - Lokesh giriI smile because I don't want to waste brushing my teeth for nothing - Daleen IrshaidFramed by my own Fate.. - Sahil KaranjeOf course I'm superstitious, the mere fact that I'm alive makes me superstitious - Gina Millicent BairdIts funny how people pretend to be something they see - Enmanuel RosadoTake your bed; it's time to lie not to lie. - mohdmustafa99I'm not gay, but twenty bucks is twenty bucks - Aaron Ortiz If you have a problem and you think solution is very long , you forget the problem - Herman TeichroebFools teach fools to do how fools do. - saintificationThe Road to Insanity begins in mind. Some have crossed the half way, some have just started .. - claudius fernandoA truthful person is that who doesn't reveal his/her lies. - mohdmustafa99A fool doesn't redress because when he writes he corrects nothing. - mohdmustafa99Cats are useless. Even mice agree with this fact. - mohdmustafa99A word without an opposite meaning is meaningless.. - Ikulabi Anikulapo IkuforijiTo have one face means you have not yet become a hypocrite. - mohdmustafa99A Miss dislikes being mistakenly called Mrs. The reverse is not true. - mohdmustafa99A thief can never steal what belongs to him - Tijani Kehinde JohnMost people are not smart in cheating , because the smart cheaters took everything of this art. - mohdmustafa99Idiots take revenge on the genius by misusing their inventions. - mohdmustafa99Sandwich must be renamed by the name of its waiter not the eater. - mohdmustafa99Creditors are like our wives , never accept apology about our small salaries. - mohdmustafa99A garrulous person is that who explains his clear talk. - mohdmustafa99A ministry of defense often has two stones for killing a bird. - mohdmustafa99Women must do a lot until gender equity becomes a male demand. - mohdmustafa99If you must lie to children, let the lies be as harmless as ABC. - Nkwachukwu Ogbuagu

Life + Funny Quotes


Life Quotes Life is still my favorite passion, though I haven't been its favorite person - Lokesh giriReminiscing your past is awful waste of present, unless present is going awful bad - Lokesh giriHe who is better than everyone else has lived his life to its limit, and should leave. - Klavin John Barry JRLove is not worth dying, that's why God made up crying - kayla lynn‎'Everything happens for a reason' where can I find that reason??! - Daleen IrshaidTo continue making love to your wife after your children have caught you, is darn near impossible! - Keith BrownThere are many uses for the key opening in a door , e.g. espionage and curiosity. - mohdmustafa99Seagulls will soon face an obesity problem if they don't stop eating leftovers outside of fast food restaurants. - Samuel E. Villegas You're only 'lost' if you are in a rush to find something or somewhere in particular, otherwise it's just called 'exploring' - Alec ChamberlainDo you want people do as you do? Do the wrong. - mohdmustafa99I am sad when I want to go to bed because I can never have the oppurtunity that I have in the day - oluwagbenga segunI read the manga of life. You're living the anime. - Tochtli SilvaEvery time anyone pretends that s/he is not seeing me, he found me doing the same. - mohdmustafa99When I'm alone by myself I become extremely intelligent but when I'm out there with the people I just become super stupid - Mhlongo Ndumiso JuliusGood guys are not hard to find. We just don't want you - Mhlongo Ndumiso JuliusPorn is the number one Billionaire industry in this world. But no one admit they're watching it. So who's watching it???? - Mhlongo Ndumiso JuliusWe Don't Spend Time, Time Spends Us! - Zeeshan AliThe world is made of many villages where we can succeed and many villages where we can fail flat......!! Duty should be on search for that Ideal progress ...!! - William SebunjeEvery stage of life with its own tricks of by passing issues....., because every stage with its own challenges.....!! Ababy can find lots of what to eat in the mother when the mother is into thinking of what to eat today.....!! tricks tricks is all we have to be good at...!! - William SebunjeThe stupidest people often tend to be the smartest people in the room - LYGASDo you need your legs to kick old habits? - Nkwachukwu OgbuaguWhere possible we must stay creative, stay thoughtful, stay courageous , find some aims and stick to them, stay reasonable, surrender where you should to keep the road open , and ensure to invest in the imaginary of good things...!! - William SebunjeIf the first wealth is health, the first health is stealth. - John Alejandro KingScarcity of Rain, Scarcity of sun shine, Scarcity of Plants, Scarcity of wind, Scarcity of profitable days and nights ....Have nothing to do with a man's integrity...!!! - William SebunjeA day come when all we have to deal with is to outsmart our own ignorance.....!! We cant stay that for life Dear...!! - William SebunjeIf we can all learn the art of resolving our own conflicts.., it means the whole world shall be conflict free...!!! - William SebunjeTalk to them is thats all you can do so well....!! - William SebunjeWe shall not keep looking classy...when all our aims are on chasing the opposite ...!! - William SebunjeWhen I was a young girl my late Uncle Henry Lee, used to say you don't believe fat meat is greasy do you? and I answered no, because my young ears heard you don't believe fat measy is greasy, and since my Mother told me that Santa wasn't real why I believe the measy greasy thing??? - Loven CarterWhen I was a young girl my late Uncle Henry Lee, used to say you don't believe fat meat is greasy do you? and I answered no, because my young ears heard you don't believe fat measy is greasy, and since my Mother told me that Santa wasn't real why I believe the measy greasy thing??? - Loven Carter

Love + Funny Quotes


Love Quotes Only those who are in love are allowed to have the luxury to say something stupid - Lokesh giriI really don't like you. I just love you. - Meagan Lynn GervaisTo show that you love someone. Don't do it on facebook. - Brandon McCullochI'm a lover and a fighter, I love to fight and I fight for love. - Christopher Jesus DiazLoves makes you fly so does weed, love makes you happy so does weed, love makes you cry so does.. naah not weed.. so which is better love or weed??.. :O - Naman sreenAnother word for marriage is compromise. - shiza shahidYou can't take back what is stuck in you - Austin Rowland For some reason this question always appears in my head ,I know I love you, but why? My answer, Y. O. L. O so why not love you! - Tee WilliamsIf you loved once then you truly are in love, if you loved twice the first one was a mistake, if you loved three times maybe there is something wrong with you. - justin carter LOVE is related to Newton's third law, deeper the love equal amount of pain in the end - Ruthvik SuriThe truth is i'm already taken by someone who is already taken by someone.. - ashRemixing of music is brutality with the originals - Vivek SahneyMy idea of Love.. was perfect, until You came along! - Shweta FernandesLove is a disease, to cure use the placebo. - mohdmustafa99When somebody says 'couple' I assume it's 4 or more people - Mhlongo Ndumiso JuliusDo not be lured by the encouragements of friends, to attach a wrong enemy......, the impact is yours to register..!! - William SebunjeWhen the mind is at holiday....., let it enjoy the holiday...!! - William SebunjeWe got to create meanings about everything we do.....for them to count....!!! - William Sebunje

All Funny Quotes

How do you wake up to tell us it isn't God will.....When everything has been because of God's will for us to be...!!!- William SebunjeBeing thoughtful can not destroy our minds....., but being feebly can break us down...!!- William SebunjeNever be an object if Su can displace single o.- Fn ShihepoThey must die if the truth kills them Khaman.- Fn ShihepoWe all have to define the key to our greatness...to some it is good school grades, maximum creativity, excessive energy , outstanding beauty of attraction , command of language ...,quick mind and to some everything is about our background to be born connected..!! Different approaches ..!!!- William SebunjeDo not be lured by friends to deny your only desired love a chance....!!- William SebunjeThey say a picture is worth a thousand words. But a picture of them saying this requires a caption.- John Alejandro KingI don't just like comedians because they make sad people smile, I love them because they make happy people laugh..- success songYour 'I will do it later' is someone's 'I have been waiting for this opportunity for so long'- ameya agrawalIsn't it weird that only few parts on our body are 'Private' to us- Shekhar BhatiEveryone can't be beautiful. We wouldn't be able to tell each other apart.- The Quoted IrisIf all things should go up and come down then discrimination, discouragement and selfishness should go up and never return.- Amoako TheophilusWe like to have jokers but only in playing cards and drama.- mohdmustafa99Work-a-hol-ic (noun) A person who tries far too hard to become a drunk (Overtime not included).- The Quoted IrisIf devil isn't a liar how does God teach us the truth?- success songHave you noticed? the bathroom mirror gives a different picture than the one in the bedroom- Mhlongo Ndumiso JuliusA president who wants to change the constitution to be elected for a third term, wants to be elected for the fourth , fifth.. etc.- mohdmustafa99A philogynist is a gentleman fond of women except his wife.- mohdmustafa99I am not a troublesome although I have a lot of banana peels.- mohdmustafa99Video games are laughter when played by people at 20 and above.- mohdmustafa99A wife must be envious of the family's female servant.- mohdmustafa99An employee wishes to have money to pay debts; when having it, his wish of paying diminishes sharply.- mohdmustafa99Mary's husband always says, 'the best husband is that famed by the name of his wife'- mohdmustafa99I'm a lot like bad whiskey, taken only as a last resort, in small doses, and very infrequently.- David L. RoseIt's easy to become anything you want in your imagination- Tijani Kehinde JohnIt is social development to change a thief from stealing to a receiver of reliefs.- mohdmustafa99Repeat your mistakes but not artistically, nor haphazardly.- mohdmustafa99There is nothing boring and sleepy as working at a job that sucks all your time and pays you with peanut change- Justice Appiah BoatengI don't hate idiots outside lecturing halls of a university.- mohdmustafa99A bald doesn't get rid of his old combs because he hopes that 'history repeats itself'.- mohdmustafa99Every time a miser opens his treasury, he changes his mind and closes it again without drawing.- mohdmustafa99Market yourself to the world of creativity, crosscheck thereafter if it's up to the standard..- Ikulabi Anikulapo IkuforijiNo matter how hard life might be, never surrender to poverty, get rich..- Ikulabi Anikulapo IkuforijiDon't be interfering.. just be God fearing!- Shweta FernandesYes, devils are in the details. Every time I deal with details of news I see them.- mohdmustafa99Old Arabs acclaimed women who sleep until midday , however this fact should not be conveyed to the contemporary female generation.- mohdmustafa99An IT guy is a computer god- Ndumiso Madame! I don't have a common name for what you have cooked.- mohdmustafa99A woman loses her virginity at 17, her fertility at 45, her temper at 50, her husband at 75, and loses her life afterward.- mohdmustafa99Literature should not be taught to adult students who think that Hamlet is the author of Shakespeare.- mohdmustafa99I met a man whose heart was like a dollar bill- Joe CervantesMaking of true men is a feminist affair.- mohdmustafa99They say, men will always be men, well, ladies will be men the day after forever- Nyandogora Edgar OnkendiA runner who follows a winner will always be a runner. But a runner who chases other runners can become a winner.- Kowsalapathy SaravananI once asked a man: why he has to eat meat when he has so many vegetables to eat. He said , because meat is so good to eat and it is healthy. Then I saw a tiger eating a man. When I asked it why it killed a man when there are other animals to eat. The tiger said, man is so good to eat and it is also healthy.- Kowsalapathy SaravananWhat is fun for one may not be fun for others.- Kowsalapathy SaravananLove is a crime if you don't abide by its rules and regulations.- Oscar Auliq IceGetting married is not a joke, but there are hundreds of jokes about marriage.- Samuel E. VillegasIf you get lost on a freeway, just follow the car with the most experience.- Joe CervantesA dream has no age- Jadean N. PittsEvery time poor Jack looks for something to steal , he finds a thief.- mohdmustafa99God is not looking for hearts that are plated with gold.- Joe CervantesWine was a friend of serenity, before it turned a friend of obscenity- mohdmustafa99Why be in a hurry ? scientists took thousands years to discover that there was life on Mars few billion years ago.- mohdmustafa99Contradiction is to use the word 'but' , BUT I don't agree with this idea.- mohdmustafa99An atheist calls God 'nothing' , and then worships this 'nothing' by quarreling with it.- mohdmustafa99Nothing is advancing here except ages.- mohdmustafa99Mad people barely go mad.- mohdmustafa99Avoid the woman who knows how to add and subtract.- Joe CervantesMy love increases when you are close.- Joe CervantesThe heart behaves very well when the wife, or husband are around.- Joe CervantesIrrelevant dreams are another reflection of irrelevance in our living circumstances.- mohdmustafa99Only after graduation, youth discover that life isn't as easy as a university.- mohdmustafa99Sometimes to do more you got to do less.- Sean Robert DaltonOnly Jesus can love those who don't love themselves. So unless you plan on being a nun, learn to love yourself.- Lorreda C SmithIf you don't have a parrot , don't annoy your cat by making it speak.- mohdmustafa99We want to make a good president but all candidates are expired ingredients.- mohdmustafa99If you want to be a merchant , don't be of a Venice type.- mohdmustafa99Rabat is the capital city in which you get eating fish every time you leave home to take ice-cream.- mohdmustafa99A married shifting nurse is a recurring wife.- mohdmustafa99Rich parents of idiotic students make a good market for private home-teachers.- mohdmustafa99One night's cough can bring you curses from your neighbors more than cancer did in thousand nights.- mohdmustafa99You have to choose, either to be my something or my nothing.- mohdmustafa99Fingerprints make crimes reveal their mysteries.- mohdmustafa99Be careful what you say on Facebook. Because it will bite you on the a** later.- Monica HillThe mind needs plenty of exercise.- Joe CervantesBadly dressed as a tailor.- mohdmustafa99Your brain has the answer somewhere in there, let us help you search!- Joe CervantesRestore your ex-wife; she has restored her happiness.- mohdmustafa99People have sharp sight, but only when you leave your trousers' zip unfastened.- mohdmustafa99The person who invented money was very poor since 'need breeds invention'.- mohdmustafa99To hate drugs equalizes to love diseases.- mohdmustafa99Faults occur when you correct the true acts.- mohdmustafa99War is not an art. It is a rat.- mohdmustafa99Sell used books because you won't care about reading them in your shop.- mohdmustafa99With some women you need an extra knock on their door, to change their no to a yes.- Joe CervantesIf I was a boxer , I would give boxing a deadly box and send it out of the sports ring.- mohdmustafa99The family that bakes together stays full forever!- Gladys GallentesWhen you don't find money in your purse, pursue purrs- mohdmustafa99You only get heart failure when you overload it with women.- Joe CervantesPeople go to the Opera House because they want to be like the people who like operas.- mohdmustafa99Success is just another word for 'I did it!'- James RolfYou are beautiful and don't thank me thank god he created you!- Noble Da GeniusWhat Jerry knows that Tom doesn't ? Escape is more important than chasing- mohdmustafa99Every Christmas it's the same thing. Goodwill to this man, Goodwill to that man. But what about the Salvation Army?- Cory PowellYour smile is contagious, your laugh is heartwarming, and your presence is cherished if you do both.- McKenna McRoyOn why I believe in manscaping: It is always important to prune the shrubs, it makes the house look bigger.- jerry biernI practiced telekinesis yesterday. Seems the cupboard didn't hear me well.- Nerd BrookeIf you love someone set them free.. so they can go around the corner and screw someone else.- JulesPut a bunch of girls in your backyard without lighting and you can hear screaming.- Nerd BrookeYou don't have to LIKE me. I'm not a FACEBOOK STATUS. You don't have to FOLLOW me. I'm not Twitter. You don't have to CHECK me. I'm not NIKE. You don't have to love me. I'm not MCDONALDS. But you sure can't have it your way. I'm not BURGER KING!- shandrekaFor all those who sell mosquito repellent.. a free tagline.. you mess with our clients in the night.. in the morning get ready for hell.- Arunesh Chand MankotiaTruth will wound you, but the acceptance of truth will kill you.- Hunter JamesReasons are not reasons, they are excuses. Dare not tolerate those excuses for neglecting one's heart. To follow the feeling in one's bones can be exactly what one needs. Acknowledge the hunches and obliterate the exasperating silence. To resist one's impulse is a bowl of anguish. Preservation is a limited convention. The more we attempt to prevent ourselves from falling, the closer we become to the fall. The innocent shall never win. The vulnerable shall never prosper Nonetheless the courageous are those who acknowledge the struggle that entails living. The pretentious are those who dare to breathe. And the ingenious are those who dare to love. There is no right and wrong. Whatever brings us stability and gets us through the day is always the sanest thing to do. A second of what you want can be worth a day of what you don't.- CamillaLife is short.. but it takes a long time to really live it. - Wes StaffordI would rather go without air, than go without dessert!- Micki SannarJust because the Mayans ran out of space on their rock calendar doesn't mean the world will end in 2012.- shiza shahidI shall never win the Nobel prize because its the 'no-behl' prize- Madhur BehlBe so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet. Make all your friends feel there is something special in them. Look at the sunny side of everything. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Be as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give everyone a smile. Spend so much time improving yourself that you have no time left to criticize others. Be too big for worry and too noble for anger.- Darab ImteyazTalk less, you are cool.. Too much and you are a Fool..- Faisal Al Jammaz If we could read minds, many people would cease to think - Karrella JonesI graduated from 'staying strong university'- JESSICA SERITA ABRAMSIt's so funny to me when people see me having a conversation with a woman, they think something is going on, let them think all they want, i enjoy talking to women, they have a lot to say! lol- JESSICA SERITA ABRAMSI never buy anything off Etsy.. I just drool.- Sarah BridgesTo say I am as poor as a church mouse would be an injustice to the mouse, he doesn't have a mortgage.- mike LorchOur lives are messages to the world waiting to be read.- MonicaWomen are like jobs, you can apply yourself to one. If you don't get that job, you can always apply yourself to another one.- DustinWhen I was looking for flowers, life threw me stones. when I was expecting stones, life threw me roses. When I longed for roses god decided enough and threw me a boulder!- bornagainSelf-centered sounds so hateful. I prefer egocentric, it sounds much more eco-friendly.- J.C. TuttleTime and Tide wait for none! Unfortunately both are Feminine!- Amit ChoudharyMovie on your life is being recorded, just press the button of your memory & watch any moment of your past.- harbinderjit singh bajajMy mom said, 'Your grandma is losing her mind. ' I said.. 'Enjoy it while you still can. '- Amanda Nicole Kealani AlvaradoIf a man reduces the level of magnesium in your blood, forget him. He has no banana! - Kristi SimoTo be insane and talk to animals is a mental illness. But to be sane and talk to animals, is plain retardation- TguiCarbon emissions are a thing of the past, what we should really worry about is our governments hot air from their mouths..- Jo LawsBeing adeptly immature is so repulsively repugnant, that in all actuality you by all means are being mature- Brooke LoughnerI eat like a monster but I look like a model.- Jaime omar perez BerganzaSometimes only the smallest star in the sky can guide your way- diya ahmed azzonyCrabs are from the sea- lalaIf I was a bird in the sky, i'm pretty sure I know who i'd shit on first.- mj mansfieldI need to buy myself a box, so I can sit outside of it, and think.- Alexis L. EastonOnce your middle finger goes up, raise your index next.- Brandon McCullochI love the earth just as much as you, i'm just too lazy to help- Justin McLlarkyI am perfection of imperfection- Angela M DerzaphApples are great, oranges are better- George AntoinetteLife's a freak show.. get over it!.- HlhkkggklI'm usually a problem for guys. They shouldn't be problems for me. We got this gender thing mixed up.- Meagan Lynn GervaisEveryone is a child; difference is just that- some are big, some are small and some are tiny, I know I'm tiny, so I must be big- Lokesh giriI have never seen a person wiser than me! not because there isn't any, but because I don't like the fact that there can be someone :)- Lokesh giriPatience is a virtue, impatience is an art- Lokesh giriThere is only one things I can never do - 'nothing'; Seriously.. I never did it.- Lokesh giri1 in 100 people believe that fractions are evil things that happen to other people.- Jack BrownWhere do I go when I die, I'm guessing that I won't know until I get there, and then it will be to late to tell any one.- Jack Brown99.9% of all people who eat pickles die.- Jack BrownThe road to hell is not paved with good intentions, it is mostly paved with religions and souls trapped by indecision and tourists who think they don't need a map because they have a GPS.- Jack BrownI am of the opinion that we create our own little worlds, with magic and dragons and glorious wars because this one is simply too complicated.- Jack BrownParents have always been saying, 'Kids these days have all gone mad' from days of old, crazy.- Lokesh giriSoul music is just your soul saying it is hungry for sound. As it always is.- Jack BrownCats are the most evil, diabolical, selfish and freaking cutest things in the world.- Jack BrownWorld wouldn't have been the same without computers, it would have been better :0- Lokesh giriNot all of us know the difference between confidence and overconfidence, because not all of us play poker.- Lokesh giri

Related Categories: Funny+Life, Funny+Love, Funny+Philosophy, Funny+Short, Funny+Truth, Funny+Wisdom, Funny+Witty,