Funny Witty Quotes Pictures

Most of us never grow up, but our age does. Most of us never grow up, but our age does...

Age Short

Grow Age
Some songs will be better with changes in their words, music and the singer. Some songs will be better with changes in their words, music and the singer...

Change Music One liners

Music
Do not Do not 'Aprilify' my foolishness, nor 'Augustinize' my temper...

Short Time

They say that luck knocks at least once in life, hence, if luck hasn They say that luck knocks at least once in life, hence, if luck hasn't yet knocked your door, then..

Inspirational Life Opportunity perspective

Life Door
Don Don't call your child 'idiot', he may be well informed about genetic heredity...

Age Family Science

Call Child
All that glitters is the root of all evil. All that glitters is the root of all evil...

Short Truth

Evil
A stitch in time saves a wardrobe malfunction. A stitch in time saves a wardrobe malfunction...

Short Truth

Time
Museums are a thing of the past Museums are a thing of the past..

Short Truth One liners

Past
My computer is SO OLD, it has Windows B.C.! My computer is SO OLD, it has Windows B.C.!..

Computers Short

Nothing can affect me more than his affection : ) Nothing can affect me more than his affection : )..

Love Short wordplay

I wake up early to appreciate the beauty of the world before all the A**holes wake up and spoil it. I wake up early to appreciate the beauty of the world before all the A**holes wake up and spoil it...

Beauty Optimism

World Beauty Wake
Bite the hand of any government that it feeds you propaganda. Bite the hand of any government that it feeds you propaganda...

Anger Inspirational Politics

Hand
Why give up if life takes no hostages? Why give up if life takes no hostages?..

Goal Life Opportunity Patience Short

Life Give
Never leave a bathroom without an idea Never leave a bathroom without an idea..

Short One liners

Idea
If you won If you won't embrace your curves.. can I?..

Beauty Computers Short

Not even a single possible thing is impossible Not even a single possible thing is impossible..

Inspirational Optimism Short

Impossible Possible Single
People who are in love with the sound of their voice eventually find they have a small audience. People who are in love with the sound of their voice eventually find they have a small audience...

Inspirational Short

Love People Find
Those who blow their own trumpets often end up hoarse Those who blow their own trumpets often end up hoarse..

Short Wisdom One liners

Being resourceful is a gift. It allows the mind to utilize various avenues to travel to one Being resourceful is a gift. It allows the mind to utilize various avenues to travel to one's own..

Education Inspirational Optimism

Being Mind Gift
Talk less if you want to communicate more Talk less if you want to communicate more..

Short Wisdom

Want Talk
I want to think outside the box because it I want to think outside the box because it's crowded in there....

Confidence Courage Creativity Imagination Short

Want Think
Everyone is searching for the key to success. You already have it. Finding the right door, the one Everyone is searching for the key to success. You already have it. Finding the right door, the one..

Desire Education Leadership Opportunity Sports

Success Door
Whether or not you have glasses or contacts, your hindsight will always be 20-20. Whether or not you have glasses or contacts, your hindsight will always be 20-20...

Life Short

Death is just nature Death is just nature's way of making room for birth...

Death Short One liners

Way Death
Since it Since it's not the best guy who always wins, you too can try..

Short

Try
Did you say life is unfair? I never heard it promising anybody anything. what do you expect? Did you say life is unfair? I never heard it promising anybody anything. what do you expect?..

Life Optimism Short

Life Expect
Love is a heaven, but it can hurt you like hell Love is a heaven, but it can hurt you like hell..

Love Short

Love Hurt Hell Heaven
It doesn It doesn't matter if you are handsome, When you have 'handy sum'...

Short

Matter
'Now' is the good time to do almost anything...

Short Time

Time
To err is human, to forgive self is not divine To err is human, to forgive self is not divine..

Short

Human Self Forgive
To err is human, to forget it is inhuman To err is human, to forget it is inhuman..

Short

Human Forget
When the cat and god are at play together, God is as work. When the cat and god are at play together, God is as work...

God Love

God Work Together Play
You You'll ignore a lot of things when you do away with ignorance...

Short One liners

Ignorance Ignore
Lying against the truth is like believing an ant to win a battle with an elephant.. Lying against the truth is like believing an ant to win a battle with an elephant....

Truth Wisdom lie

Truth Win
Envy is nonexchangeable because those envious towards you have nothing to make you envious towards Envy is nonexchangeable because those envious towards you have nothing to make you envious towards..

Hate

Anything that cannot bend is susceptible to smashing. Anything that cannot bend is susceptible to smashing...

Nature Politics Short Truth

A bird in the hand is probably not alive. A bird in the hand is probably not alive...

Short Truth

Hand Alive
Even the wise learn from fool Even the wise learn from fool's words, it's only a foolish that joke with wise words....

Philosophy Short Truth Wisdom

Learn Wise
People who think money is the root of all evil haven People who think money is the root of all evil haven't tried radishes..

Short

People Think Money Evil
Some people are good at throwing others under the bus. Some people are good at throwing others under the bus...

Short Truth

People
Christmas comes in winter because it wants us to be well demure. Christmas comes in winter because it wants us to be well demure...

Happiness

That who has the pen to write never blacklists his name. That who has the pen to write never blacklists his name...

Opportunity Short Wisdom

I don I don't agree with Sigmund Freud. This is why I didn't read any of his books...

Imagination Nature

Read
Out of all the things that has been running away in life, it Out of all the things that has been running away in life, it's my mind that I cannot escape from...

Life Truth

Let your ideas be the measure of your intelligence and not your remembrance of a textbook. Let your ideas be the measure of your intelligence and not your remembrance of a textbook...

Imagination Inspirational Wisdom

a meeting is an event where minutes are taken and hours are wasted A meeting is an event where minutes are taken and hours are wasted..

Sad Short Time Truth Wisdom

Dear Forever, I Dear Forever, I'm sorry you didn't last....

Short

Forever
So many would say, So many would say, 'past is past. ' So why study history?..

History Short

Past History

Top 10 Funny Witty Quotes

If your love is found. Congrats, you've just won something you'll possibly lose again.- Jovonta BattleDivorce is just a way of getting rich quicker.- Jovonta BattleIf time is money, and everything takes time, is it fair to say that 'Everything takes money' ?- James J. HarrisBeing lazy has advantages, for instance if you are lazy it becomes very hard to hold a grudge. Too much effort.- Jack BrownConscience will make it hard for you to tell a lie, at the same time makes it simple for you to say the truth..- success songI don't just like comedians because they make sad people smile, I love them because they make happy people laugh..- success songGreat nations want to keep us laughter, to keep having something to laugh at.- mohdmustafa99There are too many planets other than the earth; why don't we destroy one of them instead of the earth?- mohdmustafa99If devil isn't a liar how does God teach us the truth?- success songIt's not just a beard, it's an adventure.- THIGHBRUSH

All Funny Witty Quotes

A word without an opposite meaning is meaningless..- Ikulabi Anikulapo IkuforijiYes, devils are in the details. Every time I deal with details of news I see them.- mohdmustafa99When you're doing something that you like to do best, it's same as tapping happiness from source of creativity..- Kayode Seyi TayoMy religion heartens me to respect neighbors. So would you neighbors let me adhere to my belief by lessening volume of your music.- mohdmustafa99A fool and his money are a girl's best friend.- Raymond Richard ReepA museum is a thing of the past- Raymond Richard ReepWith less and less interest in antiques, museums are becoming a thing of the past.- Raymond Richard ReepAlways remember birthday as the beginning and never forget death day as the end..- Aye AyeNo one has been expelled from prison because of misconduct. I ‎wish that schools are lenient as well. ‎- mohdmustafa99Sanity is immeasurable; insanity is. ‎- mohdmustafa99If men make the same dreams of women, women will make alternative dreams. ‎- mohdmustafa99No blame on men who disregard equality of genders if they believe that women are superior. - mohdmustafa99Pride cannot see beyond two feet.- Joe CervantesIf you think I am a freak, weird, and abnormal.. then I am doing my job well!- Amelia GoodeIf I were your lighthouse we'd be awaken by the sounds of ships crashing against the shore.- Brandon KellumEvery time poor Jack looks for something to steal , he finds a thief.- mohdmustafa99Wine was a friend of serenity, before it turned a friend of obscenity- mohdmustafa99Contradiction is to use the word 'but' , BUT I don't agree with this idea.- mohdmustafa99Only after graduation, youth discover that life isn't as easy as a university.- mohdmustafa99If you don't have a parrot , don't annoy your cat by making it speak.- mohdmustafa99You have to choose, either to be my something or my nothing.- mohdmustafa99Fingerprints make crimes reveal their mysteries.- mohdmustafa99Take your bed; it's time to lie not to lie.- mohdmustafa99Faults occur when you correct the true acts.- mohdmustafa99There are many uses for the key opening in a door , e.g. espionage and curiosity.- mohdmustafa99With some women you need an extra knock on their door, to change their no to a yes.- Joe CervantesSuccess is just another word for 'I did it!'- James RolfEvery Christmas it's the same thing. Goodwill to this man, Goodwill to that man. But what about the Salvation Army?- Cory PowellOn why I believe in manscaping: It is always important to prune the shrubs, it makes the house look bigger.- jerry biernTalk less, you are cool.. Too much and you are a Fool..- Faisal Al Jammaz If we could read minds, many people would cease to think - Karrella JonesOur lives are messages to the world waiting to be read.- MonicaSelf-centered sounds so hateful. I prefer egocentric, it sounds much more eco-friendly.- J.C. TuttleMovie on your life is being recorded, just press the button of your memory & watch any moment of your past.- harbinderjit singh bajajCarbon emissions are a thing of the past, what we should really worry about is our governments hot air from their mouths..- Jo LawsIf I was a bird in the sky, i'm pretty sure I know who i'd shit on first.- mj mansfieldEveryone is a child; difference is just that- some are big, some are small and some are tiny, I know I'm tiny, so I must be big- Lokesh GiriThere is only one things I can never do - 'nothing'; Seriously.. I never did it.- Lokesh GiriSoul music is just your soul saying it is hungry for sound. As it always is.- Jack BrownCats are the most evil, diabolical, selfish and freaking cutest things in the world.- Jack BrownWorld wouldn't have been the same without computers, it would have been better :0- Lokesh Giri